Monday, October 20, 2008


As I get older I often wonder why we are as we are at middle age. Men in particular have things that happen to them that just seem to defy logic. For example, some of us are particularly hairy and others are not. Then there's you ol' pal Clark.

See, I was never blessed with a lot of hair on my head, nor the rest of my body. However, I have hair that grows where I really don't want it. My back, my ears, my nose, and my eyebrows.

Thankfully I'm not like those cave men on the insurance commercials. I have moderate hair on my back, but it's freakin' annoying! It only grows on my shoulders and its patchy. I do my best to shave it off, but I can't see it! Why does it grow there?

My eyebrows aren't so bad. I've seen some guys that look like they have caterpillars on their heads. Mine are not nearly that bad, but I have these random hairs that are twice as thick as the surrounding hairs. Plus, they stick out of my forehead a little bit. Kinda like a porcupine I guess. What is the deal though? My eyebrows were fine for nearly 40 years and now they act like there is some kind of mutant DNA in them. I find these annoying hairs randomly and yank them out by the roots. Momentary pain for a few weeks of gain.

Now that brings me to my ears. I have these random hairs that grow out of random places on my ear. My left ear is the worst. For some reason the ear lobe and the pointy part near the canal have random thick hairs that just sprout out for no apparent reason. I probably could rationalize the eyebrowns and back hairs. But why the heck are thick hairs growing out of my earlobes? If I don't keep them in check, my ears look like they belong on some simian relative.

Ugh. I guess this is payback for perfect skin?


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